The Judgemental Sheep Dream

There was a big celebration taking place. Beforehand, everyone was given a card with random animals on it, and those animals appeared in their houses. Back at my home, we had two lambs bouncing around the place.
We had a barbecue party in our back garden (which had somehow grown to comfortably sit about fifty of us) where they announced the latest competition: to design a 3D model to go on the outside of a building.
I had very limited knowledge of animation, but I decided to make my model out of plasticine. It was a bizarre creation, consisting of hot air balloons and a T-Rex. I remember watching a video of someone making a decent scene for an animation, and I tried to copy their style.
I don’t know if I won or not, but my design went up on the building. And it was breathtaking. Our new little lamb friends began to bleat, “Claire! Claire! Claire!” and jumped in the air with each word. But that chant started to change into, “cheat! Cheat! Cheat!”
I was being told off by lambs. And they wouldn’t hush. How dare they think I’d cheated!
An old friend of mine stood looking at my design jealously. We nodded to each other in acknowledgement. He was a curly haired boy, and for many reasons I had forgotten his name. He seemed young and harmless but he was the exact opposite. He was much older than he looked. Hundreds of years older, in fact. And he had done so many terrible things.
We sat together inside the building, listening to a lecturer discuss some subject or other. He introduced my friend as the new boy.
I said to him, “do you remember when you opened up that restaurant in Que Pasa?
He smiled at me and kissed his fingers in a mock Italian style. It had been a damn good restaurant.
“I did it for you,” he said. “I’d do that for you a thousand times over.”
I looked away. As he silenced the lecturer and everyone in the room, I realised I really shouldn’t be getting involved with him again. But also that I had no choice in the matter.


The Flood Dream

The house was destroyed. My parent’s home was in ruins, all thanks to the flood. The floorboards were soggy and unpredictable, the wallpaper was destroyed, but worst of all we were homeless and had no belongings to speak of.
Luckily, we had a team already helping us sort our house out – like a DIY SOS kind of team. Because the strange thing was, our house was the only place hit by the flood.
I was there when they began renovating. They were clearly doing a half-ass job of it. They were stripping the wallpaper and redecorating… but not really making it structurally sound or repairing the house. I walked carefully up the squishy stairs to my room. It had been beautifully redecorated not long before the flood, and now they’d taken all that away. Now it was wallpapered in boring cream patterns, and it just wasn’t my room. I wasn’t even sure my room had been that affected by the water.
Well, the floorboards sure had. I felt them giving way a little with each step I took. I looked through all my drawers, and surprisingly most of my clothes were in tact. I asked one of the painters if my laptop had survived. He shook his head. My keyboard hadn’t made it either.
At least I still had clothes, right?
I went back downstairs to the kitchen. Most of it had been stripped away and replaced with cheap stuff, but our oven was the same. I opened it and shoved some food in. I was starving. We sat around the kitchen table to discuss the renovations for a while. Ten minutes passed, and I opened the oven to check on the food.
Water gushed out like a miniature waterfall. The water was warm so the oven was at least doing some part of its job. Within seconds the entire kitchen was flooded again.

#FP Potentially Dangerous

When I write these #FPs, I have no inclination to a theme binding them all together. ‘Potentially dangerous’ was as close to an overriding theme as I could get! Enjoy!








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The Pirates Vs Businessmen Dream

I was in the cast of a brand new, ground-breaking play at the X-Men institute. It was set to be the latest 21st Century masterpiece. We all gathered in an abandoned cathedral to decide who was playing what. The two leading actors got to choose who they wanted on either side of the battle. Our team chose a doctor character, but couldn’t decide between Wolverine or Ryan Reynolds. Out of all the candidates, the other team wanted one of these guys too, so whoever we didn’t choose they would get. So we chose Hugh Jackman and his bulging biceps.
We were now split into our two rival teams: pirates and businessmen. I rather liked my pinstriped suit. It was snazzy.
The pirates managed to make their half of the cathedral look like the stern of a ship, whilst ours was decked out to look like offices.
We watched their performance as we waited for our part to begin. It was mildly amusing.
A friend of mine raced to hug her pirate boyfriend, only for him to dash past her and shout, “‘scuse me miss. You’re in my way.” It made us giggle. And that was bad. Because they were winning.
Their costumes were brilliant too. These were kind of gothy pirates, with all their guyliner and black leather. We watched as a man we thought was on our side burst out of his pirate costume to reveal his business suit underneath and say, “haha! I lied! I’m not one of you!” (Seriously, I’m an amazing playwright in my dreams. You couldn’t come up with genius lines like this in real life) and we all cheered at his double agency.
Then it was our performance. And the ancient and legendary battle of Pirates vs Businessmen began. Or rather, it would have, if my damn alarm hadn’t gone off.

Cinderfella Costume

Although it wasn’t used on the night, we made Cinderella’s work dress, and we were quite impressed with it!
Just call us Jaq and Gus!

– Approx 2 metres of dark brown.
– 1 metre of white cotton.
– 1 metre of light blue.
– 1 brown zip.


Approximate cost: £14

Dress measurements

– Chest
– Waist
– Length (Shoulder to Ankle)
– Hips
– Shoulder to armpit
– Shoulder to waist
– Waist to hips

Half all the width measurements and fold the material when cutting.



– Shoulder to wrist
– Width of top of arm
– Width of wrist

Apron Measurements

– Hips
– Hips to just above the ankles

Then cut a thin strip to attach to the front of the apron.


Bandana Measurements

– Ear to ear
– Hairline to back of head

Pretty straightforward. Again, you need a thin strip to make the bandana tie-able.


And here’s the finished product! Note: The fabulous model wearing it was not the intended wearer… but he still looks fabulous in it!



Elsa Costume

Again, we may have cheated a little on Elsa’s outfit… but it was totally worth it!


– Approx 2 metres of blue material.
– 2 metres of crappy but pretty and shimmery material (would not recommend, nightmare to sew).
– Light blue zip.
– Light blue corset


Approximate cost: £11 (With corset, £41)

We didn’t make templates for this outfit. We wrapped the skirt material around my flatmate, pinned it, hemmed it, put a slit in it and fitted it. The sleeves and cape were more awkward purely because of the material, but the end result was really worth it.


Who Is That Girl I See? Wait, That’s Not a Girl…

The next costume we made was Mulan’s Geisha outfit. Only it wasn’t any of the women that picked her out of the hat.

Is it ironic that a male friend of mine dressed up as the female Disney character who spends most of the movie pretending to be a man? Nah, I thought not.

This surprisingly was one of the easiest costumes we made. Because we may have cheated a little bit. Time was running out, so I bought a big pink cardigan off eBay and bought the other materials to wrap around it.

So here’s how you make your Drag Queen Mulan –

– Pink Cardigan.
– Approx 2 metres of white cotton.
– 1.5 metres of navy blue.
– A strip of red (left over from Aladdin’s belt).
– White zip.

Approximate cost (including delivery of cardigan) £13

Sorry about the quality of this pic!
Sorry about the quality of this pic!

So here he is, the Princess himself: